Sins of Angels
by CaliforniaDreamer
Summary: Literati, AU. Rory breaks, and Jess is there to pick up the pieces. A story about needing.
1. Places that I haven't been

AN: I'm not extremely sure where this came from, but it had a lot to do with Down by Something Corporate and She's Gonna Break Soon by Less Than Jake. This is extremely AU. I just want to warn you, Rory's character is very distorted, especially in this chapter, because of her situations. Don't worry, those will become clearer as this goes along. Rory and Jess are 17. Jess hasn't been sent to Luke's, and they both live in New York, but haven't met.

Also...my other story is not abandoned. I'll be getting the next chapter up soon, I just already had this written.

**Sins of Angels**

**Chapter 1—_Places that I haven't been_**

_The whole was filled with smoke and lies._

_She could hardly breathe._

Rory glanced around the room and sighed. The usual gaggle of drunk teenagers crowed an apartment that most of them couldn't dream of affording. Never mind that, they could settle for the mindless party crashing and booze mooching.

She wrinkled her nose at that thought, knowing that she would have to be included in that group. Rory didn't know why she had a right to such high and mighty thoughts. She was no better than anyone else in this room; they would all end up the same.

Failures.

Isn't that all anyone ever got out of life? The feeling that they wouldn't ever succeed, even if they died trying-which usually, they did.

She hadn't always felt that way. When she was younger, oh, she had thought she could do anything. Go to Harvard, own a spacey Victorian, hell, be the freaking president.

How naive.

No, she had learned. She was never going to be more than what she was now. No use to kill yourself tying to beat out fate.

When Rory had started junior high, she was the best reader in her class. No one else had read the Fountainhead at nine, heck; most were struggling through the Babysitter's Club series at 12. Yet, she was placed in the "slow" English class, one for kids who learned at a slow pace, with everyone else from her neighborhood.

Sometimes expectations were set by the guidelines of reputation. Sucky, but depressingly true.

Fine. They wanted a slow pace; she'd give them a slow pace. She had stopped caring, or at least pretended to. It had literally pained her at first to not do her homework. But it wasn't like anyone would care anyways. She wasn't expected to do it. Let her fall in line with the stereotypes. It was time to stop fighting them, they would win eventually.

Rory had started partying for the sole purpose of distracting herself from failure. It was the same thing every week. She would dress in a way she didn't particularly care for. Then her "friends" (what were friends, really? Why get attached? Wouldn't you get the same benefits without the hurt in the long run if you kept mere acquaintances?) would herd her off to some rich kid's apartment, filling the rest of the night with alcohol, cigarettes, and faceless guys. She had been wary at first, but joined in soon enough, letting her emotions drown in the alcohol.

After a while, morals didn't bother her.

But it was all fake. That's what it came down to, really. Everyone was faking laughs, faking friendships, faking passion. It was sad, really. Everyone pretending to have the things they were lacking. Building up fake reputations.

Damn those reputations.

She sank into a too-soft armchair, grabbing a beer from a nearby table. She scanned the room for guys. That seemed to be her only goal these days, being able to score better than her friends.

At least she had a prayer of achieving this.

She spotted a guy across the room from her. He was by himself, much like Rory. He had dark features, wavy hair that stuck out everywhere. He too looked bored with the whole setting.

They made eye contact and, familiar with the routine, he came towards her.

Rory quickly downed the rest of her beer, a last attempt to drown any thoughts left.

_Story of her life._


	2. She's gonna break

Disclaimer: Forgot this before. I don't own the show...I may distort Rory's character, but not like that...that would be ASP.

AN: Big thanks to Michelle for assuring me this wasn't complete crap. And thanks to everyone who reviewed! I don't know if this will be my normal updating speed...probably not, but reviews encourage me! hint, hint

Chapter 2-- _She's gonna break_

Once again, Jess had been dragged along to a random party thrown by some faceless person. He didn't know why he agreed to these things, probably just starved for entertainment.

No, that couldn't be it. He knew the routine; drink, nail some girl who was drunker than you, brag about it all later. Frankly, he'd much rather stay home, but his mom had her boyfriend over. (At least, he assumed it was her boyfriend, but you can't always tell with these things.) He certainly didn't want to stick around for that. It was bad enough that Lizzie would try to give him details later.

While conducting a once-over of the scene before him, he spotted a girl trying to make eye contact from across the room. She was pretty, straight brown hair falling around her shoulders, pale skin a striking contrast to the obvious tanning bed visitors around her. She was made up, but not to the extreme extent of most girls he was used to. There was something different, though. The forced way her eyes were gazing, trying disinterestedly to look "flirty", the impassive way her hand curled around her beer bottle.

She intrigued him.

It wasn't often that he came across a girl who didn't give off the desperate whore vibe. Sad, yet sickeningly true.

He stood up and walked towards her. He knew she saw him, she had broken the gaze they had held. her job was done, he could take over now.

She was prettier close up. Her eyes were a striking blue, the features on her face delicate.

"Jess," he introduced, and she looked back into his eyes.

"Rory," she said softly, almost halfheartedly.

"Shall we?" he held out his hand, half smirking. She gave a weak smile and took his hand.

Her hands were small, he noticed. And soft.

Why he was taking mental notes on some random girl's hands was beyond him.

They walked side by side off to an empty room. Rory slipped out of his hand and gently sat on the bed. She began to stare blankly at the wall ahead of her, seemingly not realizing that she was doing so. Jess stood at the doorway watching her for a moment before quietly sitting next to her.

"Quiet in here," he remarked, ironically trying to break the silence.

"Yeah. Music was giving me a headache. Too loud." He nodded.

Suddenly, she turned towards him, grabbing his hands with her own and pulling them behind her waist. Once she had drawn herself closer, she placed her lips on his, diving past any formalities. He welcomed her mouth on top of his, giving into the kiss. She pushed herself back, laying on the bed and bring him down on top of her. He moved over her, kissing her neck and playing with the hem of her shirt as she fiddled with his waistband.

"Damn it," she swore quietly. "I can't get it undone." He moved a hand down, undoing them for her. She kissed him again and he lifted up her shirt. As he began to undo her bra, Rory went in to panic mode. This wasn't right, she couldn't do this, couldn't let herself sleep with another faceless guy whose name she wouldn't remember in the morning. They should...talk first! Know each other better!

She began wishing she had thought about these things a year ago, before she started this vicious cycle.

"Shit!" She screamed, at nobody in particular, just her thoughts. Jess's hand stopped mid-stroke down her back.

She pulled away from him, balling herself up on the corner of the bed. He stayed away, unsure of what was going on, or what he should do. then he noticed her shoulders shaking ever-so slightly Was she...crying?

Cautiously, he moved closer, reaching out his hand so his fingertips gently touched her shoulder. Now that he was closer, he could see she was breathing heavily, trying to keep herself from hysterics. Her eyes were squezzed shut, lines of water framing them, stray droplets streaking across her pale cheeks. Hesitantly, he wiped the back of his hand across her cheek to brush off the tears.

"R...Rory?" He didn't know how to deal with crying girls. It was like they were broken, the cut edges oh-so fragile. If you brushed them too hard, they'd break further, but touch too gently, and they'd never heal.

He didn't even know her. The worry lumped in his throat didn't even make sense. He hoped he hadn't hurt her.

Tear-filled blue eyes looked up at him. She sat up a bit, and he placed his arm around the small of her back to support her.

He heard take a deep breath, and suddenly, felt the weight of her head laying against his shoulder. She turned her body towards him, pressing herself against his chest.

Confused, he wrapped his arms around her, holding her.

Feeling her like this, her vulnerability seeping out, her too soft hair grazing his neck, her porcelian limbs heaped against him, made him realize what a fragile girl he held.

Frankly, it scared him.

_He didn't even know her._

ooooooooo

Rory glanced up at the man holding her. He ? Why would he be concerned? Wasn't she just some random party girl as much as he was just some random party guy?

She wasn't so sure anymore. The way he looked at her...nobody had looked at her like that in the longest time.

And his arms...she felt warmer and safer cradled in them than she had felt in years.

She felt like...dare she say it? Like...she _belonged_ there.

She tried to shrug off the feeling. She had spent so many years building up walls, closing herself off from the world. Then again, maybe it wasn't that good of a thing to do. Wasn't she crying in some stranger's arms?

Stranger.

For some reason, she couldn't place that word with... Jess. Yes, that was his name. Jess.

Good name. Not common, makes it harder to flow into the seas of Josh, Matt, and Ryans.

She wouldn't want him to get lost in the masses.

After all, he was holding her, at least pretending that he cared. Which was more than she could say for any Josh, Matt, or Ryan.

She looked up at him again, locking his eyes with her own.

"Can you g-get me out of here?"

He nodded, pushing her up so he could lead her out of the room. Instinctivly, he wrapped his arm around her, pressing her back into him protectively.

It felt right.

More right than two strangers' bodies should feel so close to each other after such a short amount of time.

Then again, the word stranger didn't quite fit.


	3. When boys mean I'm protected

**Disclaimer: Don't own it. I'm not ASP, I like Jess. Also, the part about not walking by herself at night was inspired by A Whole New World by Angel Monroe.**

**AN: Thanks for all the reviews! Whoever guessed about the title, yeah, that's what I was going for. More to come on how it relates to Jess..I'm still working on Rory's past. Um...forgive me if Rory's a lot OOC right now, remember, circumstance changes people.**

_When boys mean I'm protected..._

Jess and Rory left the apartment building, a cold burst of air hitting them as they stepped onto the sidewalk. Immediately, Rory's hair started blowing in tangles in the wind, and her cheeks bore a slight tint of red. Jess instinctively tightened his arm around her back, drawing her closer. She pressed back into him automatically, turning her face so it was almost buried in his shoulder. They stopped and stood on the sidewalk for a second, getting used to the wind.

"So...left or right?" Rory looked up, a bit confused for a few seconds before what he was asking dawned on her.

"Oh...oh! You don't have to walk me, I'm fine, I've done it a million times," she assured him.

"I'm sure you have, but it would make me feel better if...I just want to make sure you get there okay." She stared at him, and felt the tight grip around her. He seemed adamant about this. Besides, he came off as an okay guy...much better than others, at least.

_The room was a swirl of neon colored lights. Green, yellow, orange, red. She blinked, trying to make them go away, but instead lost her balance and stumbled back into something hard, like wood. _

_Her head hurt. A lot. Too much alcohol. Alcohol bad._

_She pushed through the crowd, swimming in a sea of skin, too many limbs packed too tightly. She stumbled again, falling forward into the chest of a burly blonde man with an indistinguishable voice. _

_The man said something to her, but she couldn't make out the words. Too many words, they just made her head hurt worse._

_He held her by the elbows, and led her outside. Cold, dark, still noisy. She couldn't see, couldn't adjust._

_He felt him side step, heard the noises slightly fade. _

_He pulled at her waistband, all the while slamming her into something hard, brick. He kissed her hard, bitter. His tongue pushed, fighting it's way into her mouth. Not knowing what else to do, she obediently reciprocated._

_He was pulling at her, pushing her. She could hear him moan. It almost sounded like a cackle, and she shivered slightly under his grasp._

She snapped back into reality. That was just a bad night. A very bad night. The first of several bad nights.

Jess seemed different, genuinely intent on getting her home safely. And he hadn't even tried to slip his hand under her shirt yet, or even kiss her, besides the ones she had initiated back at the party.

Jess was still staring at her, looking a bit worried. Of course he was, she was just standing there, zoned out.

She managed a slight smile.

"Okay, in that case, right." She turned as she spoke, and his grasp loosened. She moved slightly in front of him, interlacing his hand with her own so she could lead the way.

They moved down several blocks in a comfortable silence. They stood not too far away, but not too close. They were, after all, strangers (there's that word again, out of place, and – dare they think it? – unwelcome).

"You know, you really shouldn't walk by yourself at night. You never know who's in the allies. Could be dangerous." Rory whipped her head around to face him, surprised at the sudden comment. She gave him a questioning stare, and he shrugged. "You said you've walked by yourself 'millions of times'. I was just thinking that might not be the best idea."

"I've lived here my entire life. I think I can handle a few blocks at night," Rory remarked, slightly perturbed.

"Oh, I'm sure you could. Just thinking out loud."

"Well, maybe you should keep it down," she retorted. "You don't even know me."

"No, I don't," he agreed.

"Right, you don't." She let go of his hand, pulling her arms around herself, as if to block out the wind. Jess stopped for a second as she moved on, watching her from behind, before jogging slightly to catch up. Once next to her, he pulled off his leather jacket and slipped it around her. She glanced at him, and after a second, shrugged into it.

"First name Lorelai, known as Rory, last name legally Gilmore, but seeing as I know nobody of that name, we'll say I don't have one. 17 years old. Likes to read, drink, and avoid her foster family at all costs. Has moved ten times." Jess looked at her oddly, wondering what she was doing. Rory just shrugged. "You didn't know me. Now you do."

"Is that really all there is to know about you?"

"Yep."

"I doubt it."

"You're not allowed to doubt it, you barely know me."

"Ah ha, barely. See, that implies there's more." She just glared at him, and he smirked back.

"First name Jess, last name Mariano. 17 as well. Likes reading, beer, and music. Hates his mom's endless cycle of boyfriends." She looked at him curiously. "Now you know me as much as I know you. Want to tell me more now? Come on, we'll make it a game," he smirked. Rory rolled her eyes at him.

Rory stopped, making Jess stumble a bit at the sudden halt.

"This one's mine," she said, gesturing towards a run down looking building beside them. He looked at her. She had that look again, the halfhearted look he had seen earlier at the party.

"You don't want to go in," he remarked.

"My, he's so perceptive," Rory rolled her eyes again.

"Why not?"

"I said I liked to avoid my foster family. This is me, avoiding." Jess merely nodded.

"I'll go up with you."

"You...you don't have to!" Rory said desperately, watching him walk into the building. She ran a bit to catch up with him. "You really, _really_ don't have to."

"Which floor you on?" Rory sighed. He really was stubborn.

"Sixth." The elevator ride was slow for her, agonizing. When it finally reached her floor, she hurried out, not allowing him to follow. He jumped out anyways, to her annoyance.

"What is your problem? Are you stalking me?" Rory snapped at him, angrier than she intended.

"Calm down. I just wanted to make sure you got home alright."

"Well, I'm in my hallway. Your job is done. Thank you." Rory turned on her heels, ready to walk away, when she felt his hand on her arm.

"Humor me, okay? Besides, am I really that bad of company?" he smirked, causing her to smile a bit. Really, she didn't know why she was freaking out. Sure, she didn't like her "family". They weren't the most...presentable people. But it wasn't like she'd see this guy ever again, right? She had no interest in seeing him again, right? Right.

She led him down the hall to her door. At the moment, she heard a glass smash on the other side, followed by a string of obscenities. Rory winced automatically, ever so slightly. But it didn't go unnoticed by Jess. Gently he laid his hand on her shoulder.

"You okay?"

"Hmm? Oh, yeah, yeah, I'm fine. I'm...I'm fine, you should go." He looked at her curiously.

"Are you sure? Because earlier, at the party, you didn't seem so fine..." he trailed off. She cringed. Damn it, that stupid party, that stupid breakdown. Damn emotions, always getting in the way, complicating things.

"I'll be fine, that was just...me being weird. I'm sorry you had to see me like that, I don't normally do...that."

"It was fine. Whatever it was, you looked like you needed it."

"Yeah," she said softly. "I think I did."

Another crash was heard, this time of bone hitting furniture. More colorful language was heard, and Jess began to worry about leaving her here.

"Are you sure your okay, because I can always get you out of here," he said.

"I'll be okay. I'd have to come back eventually," she rolled her eyes. "But thanks." Jess turned to walk away, but spun back around after a few steps. She was still standing there, staring after him.

"Ever go to Washington Square Park?" She eyed him oddly. "It's...it's nice there. Quiet. I go there a lot, just to read. I think you'd like it." She smiled.

"I thought you barely knew me, yet you think I'd like it?" he smirked.

"You just seem like you could use a place to think occasionally."

"Do I?" She smirked at him, and he returned it. He turned back, walking away again. When he reached the elevator, he looked over his shoulder.

"See you later Rory."

"Yeah." She smiled, walking into her apartment.

Opening the door, she was greeted with a very drunk "brother"/co inhabitant.

"Rrrrooorrry!" Mike slurred, fumbling over several objects in his path to her. "You get laid?" She rolled her eyes at him, staying silent as she made her way to her room. "Can't fool me, bitch! You got the glowww!"

She rolled her eyes and slammed the door shut behind her. She could still hear Mike, screaming various obscenities along with her name.

She grabbed her old, beat-up CD player in hopes of drowning out the noise. The familiar opening strands of Something Corporate's I Want to Save You filled her ears.

It sounded appropriate. But who would save her? Jess's face popped into her mind.

What was she thinking? She'd known him for a night. He was just freaked out by her breakdown; he had no intent of being her "Prince Charming". He didn't seem like the type, really.

Yet, she made a mental note to take a visit to Washington Square Park the next day.


	4. Do You Know What Stars Are?

**Disclaimer: Any character you recognize isn't mine. Some dialogue is borrowed from Lorelai's Graduation Day. Chapter title comes from "Down" by Something Corporate.**

**AN: I'm so, so, so sorry for the incredibly long wait. It was so long that I'm not even going to give an excuse, because my only excuse is that I'm lazy. But I am definitly planning on continuing and finishing this. Hopefully, I'll be able to update a lot more often. Also? I'm not used to writing dialogue. So, I'm sorry if it's not very "Rory and Jess"like. And, sorry for bringing up the overused Rand/Hemingway debate...I wanted at least a touch of non AU R/J.**

**Chapter 4--Do You Know What Stars Are? **

Rory woke up the next morning to the smell of cigarette smoke and burnt eggs. Pleasant. As her eyelids began to flutter open slowly, and her surroundings came into focus, she let out a small groan. It wasn't as if she thought she could magically be transported to the land of the Sugar Plum Fairy in her sleep, (she'd given up that dream long ago.) but it was quite a disappointment to wake up from such a good dream to this hole in the wall room strewn with dirty laundry and books.

She smiled, recalling her dream. It had been some time since she had last woken up happy.

She couldn't remember it fully, but…there were unicorns! Lots and lots of porcelain unicorns.

Okay, so that was a bit odd.

But it really was a nice dream. She was in a small town, one of those 'everybody knows your name' bits. Quirky characters up and down the street, friendly gossip on every corner. A quiet place, out of the way, with a handsome boy reading a book.

She closed her eyes and sank back into her pillow a bit further.

"Rory! Get your ass out here and help me with breakfast!"

Rory's eyes snapped back open. So much for her quite bliss.

She sighed and slid off the bed, beginning to sift through clothes. Finding victory in a pair of jeans that were probably clean, and a t-shirt that wasn't too wrinkled, Rory dressed quickly, tugged her hair into a sloppy ponytail, and reluctantly emerged from her room, ready to keep her foster mother from burning down the apartment building.

Entering the kitchen, the rancid aroma that had awoken her filled her nostrils, and she could feel her eyes water. Anna stood at the sink, scrubbing furiously at a frying pan, cigarette dangling out of the corner of her mouth. Rory thought bitterly that this must be the epitome of a pathetic existence.

It scared her, though. As much as she wanted to give, as much as she tried to convince herself that she wasn't supposed to be any better, she still wanted to be. She knew what people saw when they looked into her future. Nothing. They saw her working her way into a dead end. But they were wrong; they had to be wrong. Rory was better than that; she could be better than that. It was times like these, people like Anna, that made her truly believe that she was better.

She snapped out of her reverie once she realized Anna was barking some order or another at her.

"Hey, I've got this horrible headache, and you don't look too hung over. Do the laundry for me, just this once, Ror? Just that one load, and then you can go back to whatever the hell it is you do." Rory rolled her eyes. It was never "just one load." She'd play Anna's little slave girl all day if she agreed.

"Actually, I've got plans."

"_Excuse _me? Plans?" Anna raised an awkwardly plucked eyebrow.

"Yes. Plans." Seeing Anna's skeptical look, she elaborated. "I'm going to Washington Square, I'm meeting a friend."

"A friend, huh? So you got yourself a boy."

"What?" Rory felt her cheeks flush a deep red.

"You've got the look; the boy look. I know I've had that look lots of times, if you know what I mean." Anna nudged her none too subtly. Rory felt look.

"There was no look. Really." This was useless. "I'm going." Rory turned, grabbing her coat and keys.

"Be careful! You get pregnant, I'm not saving your ass!" Anna called out as Rory reached the door. Rory rolled her eyes, slamming the door behind her as she heard Anna mumble something about "ungrateful bitches".

ooo

What the hell was she doing here?

Rory wandered around Washington Square Park, looking for a guy she had met less than a day before. She knew practically nothing about him, and he most definitely didn't know her. She didn't even know that he'd be here. Sure he'd dropped the hint, but she couldn't know that he'd be her. Why should she trust that he hadn't forgotten her by morning?

She shook her head slightly. She would not allow herself to get this worked up over a boy. She was so much stronger than that.

Well, she thought she was. She let out a little sigh, and began to circle the park again. Maybe she missed him the first time.

She was about to give up and turn around, go back to the hellhole she called an apartment, or maybe browse a bookstore for a few hours, when she saw the telltale nest of unruly dark hair a few feet away. She smiled, despite herself, and walked over to the bench where he was sitting, peering over to make sure it was him before announcing her presence.

"Hey." At her voice, he turned around, smirking as he recognized her. She looked different in the daylight, almost innocent (despite the guarded look constantly carried in those big blue eyes). She seemed more real, not so done up. He liked it.

"Hey, yourself." She snaked around the bench, and sat, somewhat awkwardly, next to him.

"So," she began, not sure where to begin. "I like this place. It's nice. I don't come here often, but it's nice."

"Yeah, it is. Much cooler than Central Park."

"Oh, yes."

"It's where David Lee Roth got busted."

"Right, right. I hope he's got it together now."

She sat staring at him, unsure of what to do or say. She wasn't used having an actual conversation with a boy, much less one who may actually be at her intellectual level. "What are you reading?" she asked, nodding towards his book. He seemed caught off guard for a moment, clearly not used to this either. That calmed her, somehow.

"Oh. The Sun Also Rises. Hemingway." Rory wrinkled her nose, and he had to laugh. "What? Not a fan of Ernest?"

"I just don't understand stand how you can read him. I mean, he's so…_boring_. Literary equivalent to a sleeping pill."

"Oh, is that so?"

"Yep. But hey, it's okay if you're an insomniac, I suppose." Jess rolled his eyes.

"Well, what do you read? What do you consider literary coffee?"

Rory smiled shyly, reaching into her coat pocket and pulling out a paperback. Jess groaned.

"The Fountainhead? Seriously?"

"What's wrong with Rand?" Rory asked defensively.

"She's a political nut."

"She's brilliant!"

"Brilliantly psychotic." Rory rolled her eyes, smacking him on the arm lightly. "Hey!" She laughed, and he had to smile. She sounded sweet. He had a hard time believing this was the same broken girl he had met the night before.

They sat in a comfortable silence for a few moments. Rory sighed heavily, leaning her head on Jess's shoulder. He was bit taken a back; he didn't think she'd be that bold. Then again, he supposed there were a lot of things he didn't know about her.

"I'm hungry," she said after a few seconds. Her stomach growled, confirming her statement. He smirked at her, and stood up, pulling her off the bench.

"I know a place."


End file.
